Sunday, December 28, 2008

Finale

I'm just gonna rush in a post before the end of the year.

I had a bacteria infection last week for the most part. Must've been all the raw salmon sushi I ate within a period 2 days. It fucked up my stomach real bad so everything I ate got rejected. Had a fever along with it too.

I'm on a 2 week break currently, which ends today, sadly. I got sick, that's one week down, and then the second week we had our guitar rehearsals and performance, so another half a week down. Remaining days were left for games and school work.

I just started playing some FPS games recently, and while I suck at FPS, I do find it rather enjoyable.

Well, Happy New Year in advance to anyone reading this.

Friday, November 28, 2008

Something or Another

I'll be honest - I forgot what I wanted to say here.

That is all.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

The Search

So, I sprained my foot for the first time in my life yesterday. Goddam vein just kept throbbing and the pain wouldn't go away. By night, I couldn't walk.

I took a day off from school and consulted a chinese doctor. When it comes to these things, they do so much better. Right now it's already getting better, though I can't walk too fast, which is a pain because I'm used to walking fast.

Shadow popped up on MSN for the first time in like 9 months. It certainly was good to see him again and to know that he's now an officer of a huge guild on WoW after being kicked by Nadia and Eneco. He's a nice guy so I don't really know what happened, he wasn't quite sure either. Regardless, they're all now enjoying WoW, and Xeo too. He recently got his mage to 80.

Anlec server on Warhammer died hard, as Tux put it. With the recent free transfers out of Anlec, he moved his Sorcerer to Ironclaw. After chancing upon him in Vent, I moved my Zealot over as well. My other characters remain until I figure out what to do with them.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Warrior Priest

Sigmar's Blessings!

I've been playing a Warrior Priest on Skull Throne recently because a couple of my friends decided to try Order.

Generally, I'd say Warrior Priest is rather fun. It's quite challenging in a sense, but once you get used to it it's not all that bad. The first few levels are really a pain to get through because your heals are terrible and you die fast(but then again most classes die fast at low levels).

It's a nice change from playing a backline healer. There's much more involvement, and you really have to stay focused to keep people up. Most importantly, you're really hard to take down. Comparing to non-melee healers survivability is far superior.

Currently at rank 16 I'm Salvation spec'd but I'm thinking on going Grace later on, especially when 1.06 goes live with the upgrades to Prayer of Devotion and melee heals.

This serves as a good distraction until the Black Guard is released, which I'm really looking forward to.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Two

Don't ask me about the title. I'm merely putting these numbers because my recent posts all had numbers as their title.

Last I heard, my friend has 2 papers left for 'A' levels, which ends tomorrow, I think.

Secondly, HY is going to play Warhammer today, according to "King".

And, twice. It happened twice.

Don't mind the subtleties.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Seventy-seven

He stared at the clock intently. In just a few seconds he would make his move. He was neither nervous nor fazed; his face emanted a hint of confidence - almost smug. His hands slowly clenched into a fist, as several drops of pespiration trickled down the side of this face. Not drops of anxiety, but of heat. It was hot. The room, though big, was bursting full with people. The doors were closed. To him and everyone else in the room, it was almost hard to breathe.

His gaze never left the clock as the last few seconds ticked by. He did a mental countdown as he continued to stare fixatedly at the clock. Three, two... one. In that final second he jumped up to his feet and made a mad dash for the furthest door in the room. His eyes were now focused on the door. He wrenched the door handle and with the momentum he had built up with the sprint, flung open the door with explosive force. As he took his first steps out of the room, almost everyone had their heads turned at his direction. He felt emancipated.

The door now began to close. He left three others that he knew behind in the room. They did not move from their seats; they kept staring at his slowly waning figure as he distanced himself from the room with his widened steps. Them, and the remaining seventy-three people.



Just my lousy attempt at writing something after like, what, 2 years? It's probably rather bad, but meh, it's a start. AA's posts inspired me to do this, but in no way does this compare to his. I'd probably write some more if I bother, and if I remember to.

Saturday, November 08, 2008

Four

This is the forth week into the semester. And forth is right, because in chinese it's also a pun for "die".

There has already been a shitload of things to do, and there are more to come. This semester is just so heightned up in terms of workload and presentations. Still, I don't think it can compare to the stress levels of our 'A' level friends.

I heard Biology so far screwed people over pretty bad. All I can say is best of luck for that and hope the remaining papers somehow salvage the situation? I don't know, don't really know how it works.

Not much more to go, so here's hoping you all live through it.

Some big patches and the public live test server coming soon on Warhammer Online. Looking forward to that.

And then I said about how I'd write about how Mister D ate beef, but really, there's nothing to talk about at all.

There's also something I've always sworn to talk about everytime I'm on my way for my piano lessons, but never did. Perhaps I'll deal with it another day.

And sleep still stalks me.

Sunday, November 02, 2008

Xarcabard, The Land of Truths

Alone through the snow you walk.

17 measures of music surround you. It goes on like an ostinato; you're awaiting the Da Capo al Coda.

Does it ever arrive?

Perhaps you heard it, perhaps you didn't. Perhaps you weren't even waiting for the end. You just tell yourself there's only a few more measures to go.

You continue to trudge along the snow, thinking.

Thinking about how you didn't use Teleport-Vahzl to get there.

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Stagnation of Ideas

So...

While a couple of my friends have been posting witty stuff or generally thought-invoking posts, myself here has been posting shit, if you were to compare.

Okay, self-dissing and comparison aside, I still find things I write... lacking, somewhat. I don't know, I've never been able to come up with something good ever since 2 years ago.

Just the other day I sat down with a notepad and pen in my hand. I held the pen above the notepad, ready to write when something came through my mind. Half an hour went by, I almost fell asleep, and all I could come up with were all the spells in FFXI which had a sleep effect. That's not even original material!

Funny thing is that teachers used to comment that I loved to express myself through my writings. Yeah, a few years later this person can't even pen down half a paragraph of ideas.

Poly and IT has ruined one of my few interests. I'm sure of it.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

The Light Slayer

I made a Sorcerer on Warhammer last night, and was once again stumped as to what to name the character.

After some I thought I decided on "Slayeroflight". A sorcerer is probably the closest thing to a Black Mage anyway, and that's exactly what he played. His name ended with dark though, so why light? Because I'm on Destruction's side, and to go against the good(light) fits here. Also, he had a mule's(I think) name ending with light.

Not that I really wanted to steal the name...

Something's just lacking when you're not playing a game with your best friends.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Yet Another Prelude

I can't sleep.

But even though I'm here, the inspiration to write doesn't come. I think I'm now far worse with words than I once was, be it written or spoken. Though I can't say I've really been good with words, at all.

(Gets a mind block for about 5 minutes...)

New semester at school. Same old shit all over again. Not so much gut hating this time around, but it's somewhat evident in a few. Not that I care much, but how do people actually continue like this, I'd like to know.

Playing a healer in Warhammer sometimes makes you feel like shit because... people die in RvR. I guess the mindset carried over from FFXI has affected me, because in an FFXI party, you don't let people die. Of course sometimes shit happens, but generally you don't let anyone die.

And in Warhammer, well, you simply cannot save someone who is being focused fired, unless there's a few other healers healing that person as well. It's funny that you play a healer to heal, and yet in such situations you're simply too helpless to do anything to save them, except wait until they die to resurrect.

I don't really know what else to say right now. Mind's pretty empty. I guess it wasn't such a good idea to type someth- No, actually it was a good idea. It made me sleepy.

Friday, October 10, 2008

Horrifying Visions

Holidays have this effect on me.

I mean, sure, no one would complain about having a one month break, but I don't know, sometimes this boredom makes you wish you weren't on break.

Haven't been listening to music at all lately. Made my head kinda empty, I think. Only now do I open up Windows Media Player.

And I'm only here because the Warhammer servers are down for maintenance. I haven't mentioned it, but that's what I'm playing now, because Xeo and I got bluffed into believing that it wasn't seperated into NA and EU. It was only after I bought the game that I realized how it actually was.

So I'm left to play it on my own, with a couple of friends (we don't really do things together though).

We had our class chalet 2 days ago, and a couple of us didn't sleep the entire day. I came back at 9 in the morning, and decided to wait till evening to sleep. And to my horror I woke up after 3 hours.

Sleep is stalking me right now. Which makes me wonder, what the hell am I still doing here at 4 A.M.?

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Level Sync

Well, I got Puppetmaster to 56 few days ago. Most of it, in fact all the parties have been level sync'd ones. My only complaint is that I cannot cap my skills when I level in a party sync'd way below my current level.

First level sync party in Qufim.
Levelled Warrior a bit as well for my sub job.
A 5 Puppetmasters and 1 Ninja party in the dunes.
And apart from levelling, I did some Nyzul Isle assaults, ZNM fights and lots of farming.
I recently got my hands on Poulenc's Nocturnes, and have been practising Nocturne No.1 in C major like crazy. I'd been looking for this one for a while now.
Speaking of piano, next year's diploma exam syllabus is going to have some changes. If the Britten piece I'm playing doesn't get through I might want to try some of those Poulenc pieces listed, I don't know.
And just to be a little pessimistic here, less than one month of break left.

Monday, September 08, 2008

Irresponsible Adventurer

Update's going on right about now, then we get level sync after.

Xeo's been leveling Summoner on Quay. So we got him his Carby mitts the other day.
He's finally reached my Puppetmaster's level range and we partied with some other members of Deosil just two days ago.
I've been looking at the latest attachments, namely Coiler and Steam Jacket, which were added in June or something. So much gear and stuff to get, so much more farming I need to do. And my Warrior is only 26, so I need to level that sometime as well.
Also, I was PLing Xeo and Wak last week and he lent me some stuff to use. Among them was the pricey Vermillion's Cloak, with Wak's signature on it. It was probably the first and last time I'd ever wear one.

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

September Update

And so this semester's exams are over. It's already been a week so I'm probably not going to talk about it.

I finally got a new desktop PC after 6 years. I stayed up till morning just waiting for the FFXI updates again; was kind of eager to try it out on widescreen.

I think FFXI is finally giving a worthy update after so long. Level sync, as they call it, which allows you to level down(not delevel) to a lower level player's level temporarily and be able to fight and gain experience normally. Probably one of the nice additions with accordance to the new level sync system is the way they're going to scale down the current gear you have equipped when you level down so there's the option to not switch gear and of course, all the space we can free up by selling our low level gear.

Another thing I like is the option to keep beastmen seals with an NPC. That's really going to be a lot more free slots.

And uh, when Xeo and Wak get to 49 I'm gonna static with them on puppetmaster, I think.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Sheep Go To Heaven

The moment you're born you start dying, so you might as well...

Have a good time!!

Hahaha.

Saturday, August 09, 2008

One minute

Happy birthday to Singapore, Ms Goh and Sar.

Yeah, I've never had a more boring national day. Here I am, sitting at home, doing practically... Nothing.

And not much food around either. I'm hungry.

>.>

Saturday, August 02, 2008

プロジェクト

This semester's project's done. This past week up to its last moments of the mad rush is over. The aftermath? Flu and a sore throat.

Still, I have to thank everyone for their help. I wouldn't have had my class diagram, retrieval and lots of other shit done without help, really.

Exams in 2 weeks, which means these next 2 are free for us, not counting studying, and revision lectures and all that.

Actually, it's not that free after all.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Enter, the final boss

What's really important?

And what's truly genuine, in that sense?

Today just leaves me full of questions. Questions that I don't have the answer to.

I wouldn't normally be so perplexed, but this hectic project week has gotten my hands full. I can heardly breathe, and I'm sure many could say the same.

In any case, this is no time to be wasting on pointless thoughts. Pointless, at least for now.

The final battle looms ahead.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Gyakuten Meets Orchestra


The new Gyakuten Saiban orchestral album, released just 4 days ago, 16th July 2008.

Certain tracks were sort of a disappointment upon my first listen, either because it lacked the oomph or because of the recording quality itself. I like the new additions Villian Suite, Gyakuten Saiban 4 Courtroom Suite and Swingin' Zenitora though. This version of The Steel Samurai is also pretty nice.

And yeah if you noticed I finally uploaded a picture after so long. It's not much, but my current mood just beseeched me to.

I was just learning the Star Onion's version of Vana'diel March on piano. It's a very good arrangement and very fun to play.

Speaking of Vana'diel, I was just watching some Puppetmaster videos yesterday and they got me hyped up about leveling my puppetmaster(yet again). It's probably another short term kinda motivation, but I'll see how far it brings me this time.

Ah, FFXI.
Good ole AntiHero, and those before it - TheFatedOnes, Genocyde, thieveZguild.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

One Week

The tissue paper argument still stands.

But that's not even valid for use for some, because it's actually turning the tables against us. That actually makes me think, a friend like this is better without.

Friday was a good example of one, though.

And speaking of Friday, Hokkaido Fair was great. I got lots of food I wanted, like those curry buns, the special croquettes, and those cheese sticks and chocolate souffles. What came as a disappointment to me though, was the horrifying 2-hour queue for that butter pancake thingy, of which the name fails me at the moment, the lack of cheese ice-cream(!), which was sold out by the time we got there, and the ramen. I guess it was just me, but the ramen wasn't really worth my 12 dollars.

My DS has been acting strange lately. No matter the game, the touch screen starts to move up and down slightly after a period of time which, to say the least, gets really frustrating. I don't know what the problem is, but I'm leaning towards the last time I dropped it. Although, it shouldn't have had much of an impact because it was in the case.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Uncertainty?

At this stage I'm pretty lost.

I read what they say and get optimistic for a bit but then it just dies down fast when I look at my position.

Yeah, pretty damn confused. No answers yet. Only thing I can do is to keep thinking.

There hasn't been any sheet music uploads for the new Final Fantasy XI Piano Collections yet. At least, I couldn't find any. I might just buy the damn book when I get my credit card, because I'm getting impatient.

There's like 3-4 more weeks of school left, then exams. And that's 3 more weeks to code our project. And hidden among these remaining weeks are 3 tests, all secretly laid out to ambush us at our weakest. Very sly, you cunning machiavellians!

I helped Xeo with Zilart mission 8 two days ago. It was the superman fight - that's what they call Eald'narche's brother. That thing died really fast, I barely got down my rotation of 4 songs. We didn't break the record though, figured we spent too much time on preperation in the battlefield.

Well here's looking forward to tomorrow's Hokkaido Fair - I've waited far too long to try out the food there.

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

ありがとう

Well, just gonna thank everyone who made my day today (or rather, yesterday, at this point).

Uh, be it those who wished me, who bought my present, and just all around celebrated it with me, and even the food seller who gave me an extra dish.

I appreciate it.

/bow

Monday, June 30, 2008

Dissenting Opinion

Nothing much you can do to change their view about you, because after all, they're far greater and more important than you are.

Isn't that right?

Friday, June 27, 2008

Final Fantasy XI Piano Collections

Final Fantasy XI Piano Collections was released just 2 days ago, 25th June 2008.

It features different tracks as compared to the piano collections from the Final Fantasy XI Premium Box Set.

Most of the tracks are quite nice. Just some thoughts on the tracks:

A New Horizon -Tavnazian Archipelago- starts the album beautifully. I thought it captured the ambience of Tavnazian Archipelago rather well. I was actually surprised to hear it at first, because I got it mixed up with Tavnazian Safehold. Different themes I know well, but my eyes somehow saw the wrong thing.

Ronfaure is the only track in this album originally composed by Nobuo Uematsu. It's not bad, but since it's almost a transcription from the original, I thought certain sections didn't sound too well on piano. But overall, still a nice piece.

The Grand Duchy of Jeuno is one track I particularly like. I guess it's just refreshing to hear it on piano after listening to the orchestral version in game a million times over and over.

Whispers of the Gods is a nice piece, but the original track wasn't one that I took much notice of. I forgot where in the game this is played, Aydeewa Subterrane, was it? Regardless, it's very pleasent to listen to.

Stargazing is the theme of Windurst[S]. It seems the similarites between this piano collections and the one in the premuim box is that both feature the Windurst themes. This piece is pretty new, being that the OST for Wings of the Goddess was just released not too long ago, but comparing the two, this piano arrangement sounds pretty good.

Fated Strife -Besieged- is pretty interesting to listen on the piano. I was more interested in hearing how it ended, since the original track actually keeps looping. And uh, the ending was kinda lacking, at least to me.

Mercenaries' Delight is the other battle theme in this album. I'd have to say this one sounds much better than Fated Strife -Besieged-, not only because it's faster paced, but I like how they arranged it, they were careful not to miss out the trills and such.

The Sanctuary of Zi'Tah is a very tranquil piece, and on the Rise of the Zilart OST it was probably one of the better tracks. I was excited to see how it would sound on piano, but well, it wasn't as good as I had hoped. I guess I expected too much.

The Cosmic Wheel is another slow, melodious piece of Sarutabaruta[S]. It's probably as good as the OST version. I'm definitely going to learn this once I get the sheet music.

Griffons Never Die is the theme of San d'Oria[S]. It didn't quite stand out to me in the OST at first. After hearing the piano version I don't find it all that bad. But the bass part didn't quite match up to the OST version, somehow I don't think it worked very well on the piano.

And finally, Wings of the Goddess, the track I've been eagerly wanting to hear since the tracklist was announced. And it didn't disappoint. I was worried that it might be a duet, seeing how Vana'diel March #4 was, but thankfully it isn't. At least I can learn this piece. I felt the performer brought out the mood of the theme quite well. Certain sections sound difficult to bring out the melody, but heck, I'm gonna try it as soon as I can.

And that's about it. Just my personal opinion on the first few listen-throughs.

Monday, June 23, 2008

Rather, lost

I don't really know how to continue with this.

And uh, I don't think I'd actually continue to type something here this often, unless I see a good reason to. I mean, while it's sometimes a good way of leaving some thoughts and all that, I'd look at the big picture and find it a bit lame, I dunno.

Or perhaps I'm just saying this because I'm not exactly in the brightest of moods right now.

I'm a bit lost, actually.

Damn it, I should've known not to wear blue today. Fuckin' Monday blues.

Friday, June 20, 2008

Fugue

Samurai Deeper Kyo - probably the only thing Slayerofdark left me. Think I should check it out sometime.

And well, we met up with Mr. Ng for dinner. "We" refers to the MEP students of my batch. Except, the other two guys couldn't make it.

It was good to see them again, of course, but the chocolate fondue was great too. And it was Mr. Ng's treat.

He's leaving for America in August, so that was the main purpose of today.

My break is almost over; two weeks is pathetic.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Reactions

See, some people have this view about the rest of us. And you can't really change it. It's fixed with the individual, unless some great impactful something influences them. What that something is, I don't know. Could be an action, gesture, words and y'know.

What I do wonder is how people deal with things when they learn about something beyond their imagination. Well, maybe not something as great as beyond imagination, but something they weren't expecting.

And that's something I discreetly enjoy - seeing others' reactions, that is.

Monday, June 09, 2008

Prelude

I logged into Final Fantasy XI for the first time in months yesterday(not counting the viewer, I do that a lot).

Apparantly nothing much has changed. I don't do end game stuff, so there isn't really much for me to do. Haven't had the mood to party, either. The rest of AntiHero moved to WoW, so no one's really left. Orestia's mule left a linkshell message recently though.

What is left, is Deosil. While I don't really like it all that much, it's nice to see it still alive and kicking. Not that it matters, in any case; I don't really talk to them.

I don't know how much longer this game will last. Perhaps a few more years. For me though, I haven't really thought about seriously picking it up again. While I want to level puppetmaster, I never ever get enough motivation to do it. Xeo seems to still enjoy it though.

My mind has wandered somewhere else. It's been hovering around Warhammer, and since the recent delay, I went back to LOTRO. I'm still waiting for Warhammer to see how it goes. Depending on the circumstances, I might not even play it for long, I don't know.

That's as far as gaming is concerned. There's so much other shit to care about as well.

My diploma exam. I haven't signed up, but I think I'm going to this year. I can't imagine playing in a concert hall. It's far too overwhelming.

And then there's my theory results. I missed 3 marks to achieve merit, but I passed nonetheless. Well, it's all good, because I got the qualifications to teach piano now. All I need now is to learn how to teach and to gain experience. It might be fun, as a back up job.

Today's the first day of our two week break. And y'know the funny thing about breaks is that the school still doesn't let you off. I need to go back for at least three days this week.

I caught up with some friends today that I haven't seen in a while. Not a bad day.

Thursday, June 05, 2008

Lacklustre

Heh, this semester's a mess. I failed 3 tests so far.

Like I said before, the people don't make it any easier. And what with all these shit that happened recently.

Either way, all I care now is just to manage to pass through everything, and then get the hell outta here. I never got the course I wanted, so this is just a waste of time.

So much for school. This school, at least.

Monday, June 02, 2008

Verklempt #4

I overslept again today -15 minutes past the first class. And then I rushed to school, tired as hell.

Monday is never a good day. My gastric acted up in the afternoon and then I got chased around by a mad man during night class. As if I wasn't tired enough. No offence, but you don't stand there and poke someone in the hips for 5 minutes. Such droll, childish behavior. And naturally, I never understand anything during night class. I am going to fail at this rate.

Xeo returned to FFXI recently, after finally getting his new discs, which he has been waiting for weeks. I do plan on playing at some point, because my initial goal of getting Puppetmaster to 75 never saw the light.

I've come to realize I don't particularly enjoy certain end-game content. I don't know, it's pretty restricting to me in many ways. It's like you're bound to some boring routine every week. It's enjoyable at first, but all the excitement dies down quickly enough.

At this point, I wish I have something more substantial to talk about, but I'm afraid I don't.

All I can say is that today demonstrated a fine case of paying the price of being kind, as one of my friends had put it.

Sunday, June 01, 2008

Machiavellianism

There are those who are kind. But often times these people get taken advantage of. It isn't a matter of whether they're weak or not, but I'd think it's more of the situation they're in and the people they're dealing with.

See, sometimes these people just try to make everyone happy. And for ones with few friends, it isn't a stretch to say that they would want to please everyone in any way possible. Of course, I don't speak for everyone.

Then there are those who just love to take advantage of that. They demand for things, borrow things and don't return and the like. This has happened one time too many, I'd say. Know that while I might have closed one eye on the matter, I'll never forget your face, because it isn't just about forgetting, it's more than that.

And then it expands to something more. Every little action, every word said has an impact on something. Different people sense and react to these differently, and for those who display nonchalance, lucky you.

I don't exactly know where I'm going with this, because I'm tired as hell, but I'll probably sort it out at a later time.

Friday, May 30, 2008

Verklempt #3

Some people just want to make you feel guilty and down. They seem to enjoy it. It's almost like schadenfreude, in a sense.

And what he said was right - what are the chances?

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Verklempt #2

I reached the final case of Apollo Justice, and it's interesting so far. The only problem I had was with the first witness. I couldn't percieve his damn habits. I mean seriously, (highlight for spoilers) who the hell sweats at their armpits the moment they lie? Damn, that was really a bitch to find.

School never got better. I wasn't expecting much anyway. Everytime it comes down to these grouping situations you really see how everyone hates each other's guts, so to speak. Seems so much like a facade in most cases.

I almost planned on skipping school today. I walk to school every day and my feet just seemed dead today.

These days I just feel like staying at home, listening to music and playing music I like. There's almost nothing much to look forward to, maybe except some new music albums coming out over the next few months, and until I save enough money to go abroad.

Well maybe the next break, which is probably the only peace I'm ever gonna get for a long time to come.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

How to disappear completely

Yeah that's what I feel right now. Disappear from this mess I'm in. Well, "mess" isn't exactly the best word to call it, but it'd do for now. It is pretty messed up, after all.

Many issues can be drawn out from this, if you think about it. This isn't just a simple project group anymore, it's much more than that. It's more than a misunderstanding, more than communication breakdown. The point is, this is some of the craziest shit I've ever seen in school. Never did I think people would act this way.

Like I said before, I won't deny I am a last minute kind of person. I can't work without stress, and probably not till the last minute. The other members? Well I think they're far better than me in this aspect. They can do work way before the deadline, I can't. Main point is, no matter when we do the work, we will get it done in the end. Doesn't matter if it's 1 hour or a minute before the deadline, the work will be done.

To what end would you go to get your"justice"? I presume you know the situation clearly, well enough to know who's at fault. Your intentions and your disposition at the time are totally two different matters, don't link them if you can't control your emotions. We didn't need to tell anyone anything. Your actions that day told them everything.

I fail to see how anything you did that day was morally correct. Your intentions, yes. Your actions? No way in hell. If you choose to insist that you are right, I'm prepared to be scribed as your villian. Your story, after all, is none of my concern.

And what's left of it? You've just left an indelible mark upon yourself.

I'm only doing this because the soft approach didn't work. Besides, I'm not counting on you to read this. Like it would even matter, really. Some people just don't listen.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Cavalcade of anger and fear

Steini linked me this, you should take a look.

http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1739601,00.html?cnn=yes

Some of those points mentioned are actually quite true, I think. And using the virtual world as a sort of therapy, who would've thought.

And speaking about people and their qualities, this morning held one occurance which displayed the zenith of varying dispositions.

I'm typing this through the course of 2 hours. (Of course, I'm not just staring at the screen for 2 hours, rather I'm busy with work) Up till this point I can't find the correct words to describe this situation. All I can say is that it looks really bad, people in my class should know.

Perhaps when this rather tense atmosphere has settled down, I shall attempt to write about it.

I should've seen this coming. As if what happened when I awoke wasn't heralding anything. I woke up in a cacophony of noise, of half dead alarm clocks and the drilling sounds of renovation works in the apartment below mine. Needless to say I was half deaf before I even left the house.

School is probably my most dreaded place now. And probably for a long time to come.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Farewell, Allian

I was checking my friends list today on FF and then noticed that Allian left a final message in the game.

"Allian quit - 5/6/08"

I think he's actually using the MM/DD/YY format, so that's 6th May.

I missed the chance for a proper valediction. Guess I wasn't that much of a friend, was I.

I've known him way back since my bard in the 40s. I was actually levelling white mage sub at the time, and got into a party with him and his lousy connection in Qufim. He couldn't zone; everytime he does he goes into a long loading screen and then disconnects.

In any case, he was a good friend. Helped me a lot, particularly with the Evisceration NM and supplying weapons to the dunes.

Good luck out there, Allian.

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Silenced

Day 4. Pain gone, but as a counter reaction, I've temporarily lost my voice.

I wonder how tomorrow's presentation will turn out with me in this state. Either it miraculously heals within the next couple of hours, or I continue with his hoarse, deep voice. Creepy even, someone called it.

Past week has been full of tests. They just have to clutter everything within a few days and give us hell.

And, thank you Steini for the songs. X) I haven't yet had a good listen to all of them cause I've been busy, but I'll find some time this week.

Well now, I got slides to prepare for tomorrow.

Monday, May 05, 2008

Miasmatic Monday

Monday sucks. It always does, at least when's there's school. To top it off I got a damn sore throat that hurts like hell. It's been a while since I had my throat act up this bad.

And school always has this effect on me. I don't know, makes me feel lousy over nothing. Couple that with the fact that I got no music to listen to.

I think I really need a new mp3 player or something.

That's pretty much all I'm going to say. In fact, today sucks so much I don't even know why I'm even talking about it.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Something to say?

I got lazy. I want to update, but I keep procrastinating.

I don't think this is actually the best time to be saying something, because I'm sort of worn out after a day of rehearsals and guitar orientation.

And apart from the performance, it was Victor's birthday today. I bought the cake - Belgium Chocolate it was. Had to rush through the rain to get to school before the break was over, because otherwise I'd have missed the chance to get it there when everyone was present. Furthermore, I overslept - in fact I skipped the first two periods, so I take responsibility if I failed to deliver it.

I might be raiding for the first time on LOTRO this Saturday, if my application got through. I don't know, I don't really care if I don't get to join, it's just something to experience.

One last thing, my desktop monitor died out on me. Thankfully I got a laptop, and there's where I'm posting from right now.

Sunday, April 06, 2008

Start of a new trial

I completed Trials and Tribulatioins at last.

I ilke the ending, how they rounded everything up quite satisfyingly.

And so I started Apollo Justice. First case was really nice. I'd say it's comparable to 3-1, maybe even better.

4-2 looks to be all right so far. You don't learn much about the defendant on the first day though, and that's the point where I'm up to.

Hmm, what else...

Cabal. I didn't quite enjoy it. It was astonishingly easy to level for the first 35 levels or so. Then it got boring for me. I don't know, never had much interest in it in the first place. I was just trying it out of boredom.

I got lots of catching up to do for guitar. Don't know if they're going to make us perform that piece of music or what, but how the hell do you play a descending passage in thirds that fast. Practice, yes, I know.

And I've been thinking of returning to LOTRO. These recent updates look pretty good, to be honest. I think I'd do that, just to kill time till Warhammer, which has been delayed till fall, comes out. I don't think I've ever talked about LOTRO here, but I played it for a few months last year.

Oh and one last thing. 14 days till NEW 逆転 NOT 裁判. No information regarding the game has been released yet, so it's still pretty much a mystery to everyone. Guess we'll just have to wait and see.

Saturday, March 29, 2008

As though nothing ever happened

To some extent, it's true.

Xeo's PC broke down so that explains his disappearance for the past week or so, right after getting his cooking apron from the cooking guild.

I've been playing 9Dragons for most of the break, and for some unknown reason I actually rather enjoy it. It's not often that free online games actually catch my attention for long. I don't know if it's because of the interesting kung fu or what, but yeah, I like it, like I said.

Warhammer Online: Age of Reckoning needs to be released already! I hate to say it, but Final Fantasy XI is getting a little boring after so many years; close to 4 now, I think. And that might be an understatement, because I'm biased.

Well with all that said, I'm looking forward (not) to the remaining 3 weeks of my break.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Just a short update

Steini and Tarfur were brewing beer. XD

And uh, exam results will be released tomorrow. I don't give a damn, really.

Saturday, March 15, 2008

Perfect Cadence

I'm finally done with the theory grade 8 exam today. 3 damn hours in a cold room, it couldn't have been any better. Luckily for me my nose didn't act up so much.

I met Xue Li at the entrance after my exam. What a coincidence, considering I'm no longer entered through the school. I switched to a private teacher last year. It wasn't such a surprise to me though, I mean, we were both taking grade 8.

It was fairly easy I think. Question 1 was very fun to play around with the sequences, and question 4 was, hands down, the easiest question I've ever come across. I guess it's safe to say that. I'm going to laugh if I fail that question. Question 5 had me trying to recall single and double reed instruments. I didn't figure it out in the end, I just guessed. 2 and 3 were average. Not the hardest I've seen, and at least the damn tune was easy to hum out. They could've thrown us 6 sharps with lots of accidentals or something, heh that'd have been hell.

Okay I got sort of carried away, but well yeah the exam wasn't so bad.

I watched The Spiderwick Chronicles a few days ago, and I thought it as pretty good. At least, in my opinion, better than The Golden Compass. The tickets were free too, cause I won them from Lime or something. That guy's sister reminds me so much of Karin from Shadow Hearts Covenant, with the rapier and all. And I think she was the only one who did any actual fighting. The rest was all throwing and spraying tomato sauce and stepping on floorboards and stuff like that. Pretty interesting though, and the idea that the ogre would become his father didn't occur to me.

On Phoenix Wright, I slowed down a little. I'm still on case 5 of Trials and Tribulations and things are looking quite interesting right now. I wonder who would be the next few witnesses to appear.

I guess I've said all that I wanted to for now.

Saturday, March 08, 2008

Minor 2nd, Perfect 4th down

All these strange fucked up dreams or nightmares I've been having lately...

Must be due to all this lack of sleep for the past week. I mean, it's good to have a wild imagination sometimes, but this is clearly getting out of hand.

Well, believe me, you can't trust your dreams.

Thursday, March 06, 2008

17 minutes

17 minutes on the train home.

17 minutes of nothingness, only because there's no seats and it's packed to the brim, so to speak.

At times like these the only thing I can do is try to balance myself the whole time.

I think.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Trials and Tribulations

Case 3-2 clearly demonstrated "Double Jeopardy", whereby a defendant cannot be tried in court again after being declared innocent for a particular crime.

3-3 is about a poisoning incident at a French restaurant. Pretty interesting case, dealing with money and loans and all.

3-4 occurs in the past, and is Mia's first case as a defense attorney. I didn't get to play much of it before my batteries started to die, though. I don't like to play while it's charging, cause I get pretty restricted in terms of movement.

I'm aiming for the last case tonight, but now that I think of it, maybe I don't have the time. I'm going to party with Xeo and Wak on Dragoon. Ah yes, I finally unlocked it a few days ago, and I'm really enjoying it so far. My only gripe is with the wyvern dying to AoE attacks ever so often. It's easy to neglect its HP and wanting to keep going, so sometimes it dies before reaching the 20 minute recast.

Well now that I'm on break, I actually followed a couple of friends to look for a job through an agent. I'm kinda nervous about the whole thing, I don't know how it'd turn out. It keeps flashing through my mind like some pestiferous, uh, thought. Can't settle for a better word right now. Heh, I don't know, all I can do now is wait and see.

Perhaps I'd be more comfortable teaching piano instead. All I need is to get my grade 8 theory certificate. Speaking of which, my theory exam is just 2 weeks away, on 15th March. Am I prepared? I hope I am.

And uh, is it just me or was that thing he wrote kinda sketchy? I get this subtle hint that he's insinuating something about that person. Well, I didn't think it was too hard to catch, but I must commend his effort for trying, even if that wasn't his original implication.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Fragrance of Dark Coffee

Godot's theme is pretty awesome, I have to say. And the orchestral version of it makes it so much more amazing.

I'm currently on case 2 of Trials and Tribulations. Case 1 was rather good, comparing to the previous 2 games first cases. Case 2 so far seems like a pretty interesting change from the normal cases. I won't spoil what it is, but well I don't think it's that hard to guess either.

I got hold my copy of Apollo Justice, so right now it's just sitting there waiting for me.

And in Final Fantasy XI, I think it's finally time I try to unlock Dragoon. Everytime I decided to do it, I'd start having second thoughts about it, because I needed to mine for a dragon egg, then fight a dragon way over at Sandy. I guess I probably wasn't very interested in Dragoon after all, huh, if being able to play the job wasn't even enough motivation to unlock it.

Well now back to more Phoenix Wright.

Friday, February 22, 2008

Examを終わりました

It certainly was a coincidence today. I met the guy who liked the Final Fantasy piece that I played on piano 2 years ago. I didn't stop to chat though. I was too tired and was slightly disoriented after sleeping on the train home.

My last paper was today. I'm glad it's over, for now at least.

I think I finally got the rough idea of riding a bicycle, thanks to everyone's help. I still have some trouble balancing, but hey, it's progress.

I apologize if I dampened anyone's moods at first. To tell the truth, I felt pretty lousy all of a sudden. I figured I wouldn't be able to succeed in learning and didn't want anyone to waste their time trying to teach me, that's why I kinda discounted myself to even rent a bicycle. Call it inferiority complex.

On a much brighter note, Apollo Justice will finally reach stores where I am, tomorrow. That's more than enough motivation to finish up Trials and Tribulations, which I just started this morning, before my exam.

And in a few, I will turn in after a long day of...

Objection!

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Exemplification of Deterioration

I should've seen it coming.

Honestly, it was far worse than I thought. That's the reality.

When did school end up like this?

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

On the spur of the moment

I don't really know what I'm doing anymore.

Why does it dawn on me that what I've done is hyprocritical, why do I get this feeling that you're giving out subtle signs that you hate being "betrayed".

I don't know exactly what I'm doing here.

I wasn't trying to do anything I didn't intend. Somehow, something keeps overwhelming me with possibly irrational thoughts. I wasn't ignoring. Well, I was trying not to ignore. It was totally unachievable.

And on the spur of the moment, I feel I should go back to what I was. I feel like not being associated with anyone would put me in a more advantageous position, where I wouldn't be accused of betraying anyone or being some selfish hypocrite. After all, I never had anything to do with you in the first place, right?

I don't understand why it is so difficult to return to my previous self. Back then I never talked enough to hurt anyone, I never did anything to possibly harm anyone. I never had any usual "friends" I could hang out with, I was always alone.

Alone. I liked the solitude.

But I realized something, there'll come a time where you won't get anywhere by yourself. Which is why I so painstakingly forced myself to talk more, because this is what everyone says. Talk more, you're too quiet. It's not something innate. I couldn't just suddenly be able to talk and converse well with people. In so doing, I think somehow, I forced out any words I could think of, to the extent I don't know I actually trespassed their sensitive zone. I believe I possess some charactersistics identified in the diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome, and well, I'd say that doesn't help much.

That's when I started Final Fantasy XI. I didn't need to converse with people face to face. I could do so online, represented by my alter-ego, my character in the game. It's safe to say the game changed my life a lot, because I met a lot of people I couldn't meet otherwise. Many people actually had an impact on me, many I respected or just had lots of fun with. It also changed my view on things and the world, made me more open-minded and more familiar with things I wouldn't know being cooped up in this country.

I guess my topic kinda strayed a little. What was my topic to begin with anyway?

Ah yes, talking about Final Fantasy XI sparked me up, I don't really feel all that lousy anymore. But my point still remains. This isn't just a one-time thing. It's a recurring event, and it's bound to catch me off guard at some point.

I don't know what'll happen then. Meh, I shouldn't even think about it.

On the bright side, 2 papers down, only Java left. And then a 2 month break.

I'm willing to bet peoples' dispositions will change once our second year begins. It was never set in stone anyway, eh?

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Can I even say anything?

Tell me the definition of a friend, because I think, I've gotten the whole concept wrong.

Or should I say, your definition.

I don't want to care about all these little things, because honestly, they are ubiquitous. Precisely so that I want to ignore it. But some people just have to bring up all these petty annoyances every single time.

While I agree different people have different definitions of the word 'friend', I'm sorry to say that yours might be a little far-fetched.

I'll tell ya what I think, I'd say it's jealousy. Jealous that someone just stole your precious gems away from you for a day or so. And no, I never signed my name against the slip of the anti-hero in your story.

Whatever it is, don't end up doing stupid things that only you can think of. And don't say I didn't warn you.

Yeah, I'm gonna ignore whatever foolish acts you're gonna draft up.

I thought what I'd do was, I'd pretend I was one of those deaf-mutes.

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Hold it!

Professor Layton and the Curious Village for the DS will be released today.

9 more days to Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney...

...And 8 days to my first paper.

I like how games I want are being released during the exam period. It's almost as if its mocking me. Though exam or not, I'm still going to buy them.

The soundtrack of Folklore is pretty good, in my opinion. Many tracks manage to set an atmosphere that is haunting and somewhat creepy, yet mystically beautiful. I am able to picture how certain events play out just by the stories drafted by the music, and I haven't even played the game. Definitely going to get this game when I get my Playstation 3.

Studying would commence soon. Damn these exams, spoiling my holiday mood.

Friday, February 08, 2008

Hmm...

Y'know sometimes I let what I say to people bother me. "Sometimes" might even be an understatement.

Perhaps being too frank or sarcastic sometimes just doesn't cut it. I mean, it's possibly because of the people's reactions and how they take your words. These kind of responses, verbal or non-verbal, somehow overwhelm me pretty easily. And in your subconsciousness, it keeps telling you, yeah you've just messed up.

Though of late I've been able to overcome this with lesser effort, I can't say that these feelings have totally dissipated. I don't think it's aberrant either.

I wonder if anyone else have this kind of feeling, the feeling of thinking you're lousy just because you think that you've screwed someone over, even though it didn't matter to that someone (but you don't know whether it did).

Well, just something that came to mind.

Thursday, February 07, 2008

Reprise

Been a while.

I just decided to change this whole damn thing to a simpler looking page.

So about a year has gone by, with a shitload of events. I'm not going to list them all. In fact, my mind is pretty blank right now. For some reason this always happens when I type.

Final Fantasy XI has remained rather stagnant for me. The number of times I've logged in for the past few months can probably be counted using my own two hands. Most of my in-game friends have either quit and/or gone to WoW. In fact, if it wasn't for Xeo's second return to the game, I don't think I'll still be talking about it. I just leveled Dancer with his Black Mage a few days ago.

School has been what it's supposed to be. It kills people, I tell ya. Projects and tests are armed with a whole array of weapons, and the people don't make it any better half the time. Well, school does have its fair share of enjoyable moments, though, I'll give it that much.

There's this classmate of ours that we've decided to beleaguer with sarcasm all the time. I was probaby off my head, but I enjoyed it so much, it was literally an all-out assault yesterday.

Wrong time to be up, I'd say. I forgot what day it is.

Happy Chinese New Year everyone.